I get this extreme sense of gratitude when I think of my bunch of friends.
Life parted few of them…but fortunately I have not lost them yet.
Few weeks back a friend called up from abroad. Last week another friend came down to my home town, especially to meet me and to catch up on the life passed by. In my college we fought once…but our friendship still rocks. Well, don’t confuse friends with colleagues, in my workplace, this new friend is cute & much younger than me…we drove long distance and after disappointment of sold out movie, recovered all with tons of ice creams. The friend on the nook of the street…we spent some of the best time together…I dressed her up in her wedding… She helped me shifting the house. Before I wondered how you can have a joke in English…till we laughed like crazy together.
Few week-ends gets over without my friend knocking the door or ringing my phone.
A relation beyond any cast, creed, region, language, looks, Age, gender, culture, lifestyle and social status….A relation where you don’t have to work on whom to like, how much and when.
This is a relation we choose on our own. We are not born with it and we are not confined in it. There is no commitment, but innocent willingness to be with him/her. They are always there whether you are in technical distress or emotional conflict or of any other non-practical reasons. Among friends, righteousness and trust are the rule. I don’t have too many but I have the few steadiest friends.
Of course there are technical theories of friendships which bring people close like Similarity: How much we have in common with them (‘birds of a feather’). Similar friends provide social validation for our beliefs, characteristics, etc. In practice, opposites seldom attract. Proximity: The leads us to like most people we see often. Reciprocity: We like people who like us and dislike those who dislike us. Beauty: Physical attraction counts, although how it is defined varies around the world. Competence: We like people who are competent (but they should not be too perfect).
There will also be stages of friendships… 1. We play safe with small talk and simple, harmless clichés like ‘Life’s like that’, following standards of social desirability and norms of appropriateness. 2. We now start to reveal ourselves, expressing personal attitudes about moderate topics such as government and education. 3. Now we start to talk about private and personal matters. 4. The relationship now reaches a plateau in which personal things are shared and each can predict the emotional reactions of the other person. And finally 5. When the relationship starts to break down and costs exceed benefits, then there is a withdrawal of disclosure which leads to termination of the relationship… :-)
May be I have found all my friends on the ground of similarity and I have reached no.5 in second paragraph too. Whatever, for everything there is some Chemistry!!
A big thanks to all my friends…
Close up:
"How, O how could I stay silent, how, O how could I keep quiet?My friend whom I love has turned to clay:Enkidu my friend whom I love has turned to clay.Am I not like him? Must I lie down too, never to rise again?"
Epic of Gilgamesh, Tablet X, column V.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Monday, October 13, 2008
Sufism-swimming underwater
This phase of my life called being hit by swimming and Sufism.
Being weightless on the water surface & being mystified by the Sufi music. Swimming underwater and & reveling the age old theology. The summersaults & the stories of the Nasuridin Hodjha….seem to be paired up. :-D
Sufism is neither a religion nor a cult nor a sect, nor is it only from the East or from the West. Sufism is wisdom, an open door to Truth; the wise feel sympathy towards all beliefs, while at the same time avoiding speculation upon abstract concepts. As if all mammals can swim without any artificial assistance. Just by instinct. The word Sufi, according to Greek and Arabic etymologies, means 'wisdom' for the one and 'purity' for the other. In reality, Sufism is the essence of all religious ideals coming from Islam, Greek philosophy, Hinduism and the Zorashtrian, and has even been appropriated during different periods of history by large cultural and religious streams, without ever losing its own universal identity.
One has to encourage the rejection of wealth and class distinctions, Base themselves on the simpler lives and model the poor wandering are designations of the Sufism. The spiritual maturation…how shall I explain it…It’s like "Speech is born out of longing, true description from the real taste.
The one, who tastes, knows; the one who explains, lies.
How can you describe the true form of something
In whose presence you are blotted out? And in whose being you still exist?
And who lives as a sign for your journey?"
Read Rumi and Kabir.
You give up every thing you ever had in order to possess everything again you want to. You blank out to nil and restart all over again in search of all you wanted… Hmm…I would like to be Sufi monk then…to decide what is my freedom for me…
Close up:
Nasrudin appeared at court wearing a magnificent turban and asking for money for charity. 'You come here asking for money, yet you are wearing an extremely expensive turban on your head. How much did that extraordinary thing cost?' asked the sultan.
'Five hundred gold coins,' replied the wise Sufi.The minister muttered: 'That's impossible. No turban could cost such a fortune.'Nasrudin insisted: ‘I did not come here only to beg, I also came to do business. I paid all that money for the turban because I knew that, in the entire world, only a sultan would be capable of buying it for six hundred gold coins, so that I could give the surplus to the poor.'The sultan was flattered and paid what Nasrudin asked.
On the way out, the wise man said to the minister: ‘you may know the value of a turban, but I know how far a man's vanity can take him.'
Being weightless on the water surface & being mystified by the Sufi music. Swimming underwater and & reveling the age old theology. The summersaults & the stories of the Nasuridin Hodjha….seem to be paired up. :-D
Sufism is neither a religion nor a cult nor a sect, nor is it only from the East or from the West. Sufism is wisdom, an open door to Truth; the wise feel sympathy towards all beliefs, while at the same time avoiding speculation upon abstract concepts. As if all mammals can swim without any artificial assistance. Just by instinct. The word Sufi, according to Greek and Arabic etymologies, means 'wisdom' for the one and 'purity' for the other. In reality, Sufism is the essence of all religious ideals coming from Islam, Greek philosophy, Hinduism and the Zorashtrian, and has even been appropriated during different periods of history by large cultural and religious streams, without ever losing its own universal identity.
One has to encourage the rejection of wealth and class distinctions, Base themselves on the simpler lives and model the poor wandering are designations of the Sufism. The spiritual maturation…how shall I explain it…It’s like "Speech is born out of longing, true description from the real taste.
The one, who tastes, knows; the one who explains, lies.
How can you describe the true form of something
In whose presence you are blotted out? And in whose being you still exist?
And who lives as a sign for your journey?"
Read Rumi and Kabir.
You give up every thing you ever had in order to possess everything again you want to. You blank out to nil and restart all over again in search of all you wanted… Hmm…I would like to be Sufi monk then…to decide what is my freedom for me…
Close up:
Nasrudin appeared at court wearing a magnificent turban and asking for money for charity. 'You come here asking for money, yet you are wearing an extremely expensive turban on your head. How much did that extraordinary thing cost?' asked the sultan.
'Five hundred gold coins,' replied the wise Sufi.The minister muttered: 'That's impossible. No turban could cost such a fortune.'Nasrudin insisted: ‘I did not come here only to beg, I also came to do business. I paid all that money for the turban because I knew that, in the entire world, only a sultan would be capable of buying it for six hundred gold coins, so that I could give the surplus to the poor.'The sultan was flattered and paid what Nasrudin asked.
On the way out, the wise man said to the minister: ‘you may know the value of a turban, but I know how far a man's vanity can take him.'
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
A visit to an old age home.
It’s not much far from my residence and, Last Saturday we dropped in at this place. A serene location and the not an impressive building. The first impressive thing I found there is the founder trusty….Wow she was very accommodative. She spoke in fluent Hindi with my mother. She thanked me for my being there and accepted all my little offerings gratefully.
Then she walked me through the statistics: Total senior citizens: 93, sponsored: 65- non sponsored: 28, Staff (Medically trained): 32 (23- female & 9-males), there was one chief nurse. Staff is paid average 2000/- per month. If you wanna sponsor a uncle or aunty for one month it costs 3000/-. Once in 45 days all the old uncles and aunties are taken out to visit the city. Every month they celebrate B’days of 6 uncles/aunties.
Then….the chief nurse took us to the rooms …well maintained, big, lighted and clean. First Uncle whom I met was 103 yrs old and his children dropped him here when he did not die at the end of 99th years….Idiots :( he was continuously speaking ‘Narayan-Narayan’. My mischievous mind thought he must be having lot of stories ….well and another aunty she was fat and fair, as soon as she show the nurse, she swiftly got up from the chair and childishly veiled her to come near…and she opened the cupboard. We were surprised what is she up to?? Ohh…That Aunty wanted to give some eatable to her favorite care taker. We all laughed and said Hi to another Lady…Oh my god!!! She is so beautiful. Age old stunner in stiff white spotless sari. What a brutality to leave such charming mother at home?? All alone? She was from Chennai and she smiled at my mother…and they were talking in minute. I was observing her room. She had all the fancy amenities on her own apart from some one to talk to. She asked my mother, “Are you coming to home?” my mother said NO. Confidently. May be She thought if that so my mother can be her company. Another old woman was very old, weak and completely bed ridden. She was a sponsored resident and her son used to come to see her daily….and the list goes on.
I departed after 2 hours… I think all the children who don’t take care of parents should be punished by govt.
I think they all would have felt good. I think I am also feeling good :-) I think I will go there again…
Then she walked me through the statistics: Total senior citizens: 93, sponsored: 65- non sponsored: 28, Staff (Medically trained): 32 (23- female & 9-males), there was one chief nurse. Staff is paid average 2000/- per month. If you wanna sponsor a uncle or aunty for one month it costs 3000/-. Once in 45 days all the old uncles and aunties are taken out to visit the city. Every month they celebrate B’days of 6 uncles/aunties.
Then….the chief nurse took us to the rooms …well maintained, big, lighted and clean. First Uncle whom I met was 103 yrs old and his children dropped him here when he did not die at the end of 99th years….Idiots :( he was continuously speaking ‘Narayan-Narayan’. My mischievous mind thought he must be having lot of stories ….well and another aunty she was fat and fair, as soon as she show the nurse, she swiftly got up from the chair and childishly veiled her to come near…and she opened the cupboard. We were surprised what is she up to?? Ohh…That Aunty wanted to give some eatable to her favorite care taker. We all laughed and said Hi to another Lady…Oh my god!!! She is so beautiful. Age old stunner in stiff white spotless sari. What a brutality to leave such charming mother at home?? All alone? She was from Chennai and she smiled at my mother…and they were talking in minute. I was observing her room. She had all the fancy amenities on her own apart from some one to talk to. She asked my mother, “Are you coming to home?” my mother said NO. Confidently. May be She thought if that so my mother can be her company. Another old woman was very old, weak and completely bed ridden. She was a sponsored resident and her son used to come to see her daily….and the list goes on.
I departed after 2 hours… I think all the children who don’t take care of parents should be punished by govt.
I think they all would have felt good. I think I am also feeling good :-) I think I will go there again…
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